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For a long long time, my life is all about competition. Everything is about winning. I wanted to score higher at schools, to do better research and publish more papers than my peer, and to perform better than my coworkers in order to excel. Even in my own private life, I would unconsciously compete with people who are closet to me. I freakishly enjoy the feeling of being better than others, even for hobbies, and completely forget what hobby is all about. Sure, there is nothing wrong to want to be better. But I should start taking off my competitive suit, and just enjoy the pleasure of doing something, not for winning.